My dads side of the family I never really got to know. I had memories of them from when I was 5 to 8 years old. Other then that I never really saw them. My daddy was a dead beat and none of them ever stepped up to the plate to try and help, change, beat the odds of me having a bad childhood. So when I became 18, rather 19, my mother told me that she’s ran into what used to be my favorite Aunt. She told me my Aunt had told her and gave her what used to be my favorite cousin, actually the big sister I used to look up to. I was working, going through life and circumstances. So when a calm time came along. I gave that cousin a call. I gave her and her daughter a chance. No one else had stepped up. So I decided if I was going to give my mothers crazy, out of control, rude, abusive family a chance all my childhood life.
I had to give at least some of my dads side of the family a chance to see what could happen grow there. My mom was dead against it the whole way. She told me how his family stole from her, dropped there pants and showed her there dicks trying to fuck her when she was younger knowing she was loyal and only loyal to my dad. She was a V when they got together and pretty much until she fell out of love with him he was the only man she’d ever slept with. She told me his brothers had stole money from her. So she pretty much wanted me to leave the whole family alone. But like I said, her family she had me around was bad. The whole time. She never packed me up and left those people completely alone once and for all. So I felt it was only fair to give what used to be my favorite cousin.
The girl I prayed for every year to come back into my life from the age of 8 and the last time we talked on the phone when she was pregnant at 14. Let her and her child into my life. My mind was already made up if they didn’t work out for us I would walk away from it all, from them as well just like I did my mom’s side. Well it didn’t work. She was rude. Disrespectful from day one. To the people that were already in her life, from the first conversation I had with her. I knew from that first moment, I couldn’t trust telling her the truth about much when it came down to my life and my business . What me and my family had. I couldn’t be up front with her about anything. Because anything I opened up to her about, I would hear about it again. So everything we discuss. Was always 50% lie to 50% truth. I wasn’t about to allow her to treat me the same way she did her self and others. I gave her three years off and on. To get it right. Prove that she was someone worthy of being in my world. She failed every test. Including trying to com between me any my mother. My mother, my best friend and in a lot of ways my daughter. Made me know I never wanted her anywhere near my unborn children, or family I am building for myself. Because “ Light and Dark can’t live under the same roof!”.